Perhaps you have discovered your self hysterically weeping in a fast-food joint’s parking lot, your very best pal simultaneously wanting to hand-feed both you and hold the hair on your head straight back while you yell, “get myself away! Exactly how will I ever continue? I’ll most likely never love once again!” through snotty tears? Or could you be … maybe not gay?

Ah, heartbreak! The primary reason tunes tend to be sung and mural art are coated, the motivation behind large art-like

Romeo and Juliet

and

Red (Taylor’s Variation)

. I thought I’d observed all of it, thought the discomfort. However we
began matchmaking ladies
— and unfortunately, something they forget to mention at Lesbian Orientation usually your first queer separation will ruin you, in a “can I be hospitalized because of this immense and insurmountable enduring” kind of way. Finally feeling physically and emotionally attracted (and committed) to some one you like just hits different.

2-3 weeks ago, I found myself personally into the throes of my personal basic lesbian breakup. I cut up my personal ex’s top into a lot of pieces, smeared dog poop all over it, and kept it out for them to find in leading garden. However retired towards the comfort of my own personal despair cavern (my personal bed) and did just what any heartbroken Gen Z–millennial cusp must do mid-breakup: doomscroll on TikTok into the wee several hours. But when I unsealed the software additionally the little FBI guy in my own telephone shuttled me directly to the leading web page of Lesbian TikTok, I rapidly realized the sapphic gods hadn’t only arrive for me — they had are available for people

all

. Inside the terms of queer TikToker Victoria Paris, ”
Most of the white homosexual ladies are battling!
”

Blame it regarding
Lesbian Breakup Curse
. Throughout the few days I became unplugged from the online world, sleeping facedown to my cooking area floor and feeling sorry for myself personally, Lesbian TikTok definitely imploded over a series of high-profile queer breakups that tore the #wlw area to pieces.

It appears as though all TikTok lesbians tend to be separating as well, together with crisis makes

Admiration Island

resemble young child’s play. Based on some, the Curse was
in the beginning cast
whenever lesbian pop star Fletcher started teasing another track from her coming record,

Woman of My Dreams

. The tune, “Becky’s therefore Hot,” describes so how hot the woman ex’s brand-new girl is and shows that she desires know-how hot-girl Becky “tastes.” Fletcher’s ex, prominent LGBTQ YouTuber Shannon Beveridge, immediately took to TikTok herself in reaction on tune, clarifying that “no one questioned authorization.” Gay
disorder
ensued.

Quickly, celebrity lovers starting from A-lister
JoJo Siwa
and former sweetheart Kylie Prew, to college basketball celebrity
Sedona Prince
and previous sweetheart Rylee LeGlue were separating quicker than they might U-Haul to start with. Therefore the gays online had been Eating! It! Up! There had been clapback duets, incriminating remark
posts
, not so sly visits to
Disneyland
, $80
merch
on the market,
literal invoices
— how do a lesbian with a full time job and a screen-time limitation on her telephone perhaps previously keep pace?! Well, I did exactly what any heartbroken lesbian must do at one time similar to this: I labeled as from work, popped some popcorn, took a few Klonopin, smashed that “disregard Limit” button, and kept scrolling.

Before you decide to come at me personally for reveling within the suffering of genuine men and women, listed here is the fact: When you’re in your dark colored destination, it may feel good to watch someone else’s life break apart. Normally, so why do we see incredible reality programs like

Adore Island

or

90 Time Fiancé

? Even a good old-fashioned rom-com can hit the place. Drama heals crisis, and absolutely nothing shuts your head down quite like projecting your discomfort and enduring onto simple Brits exactly who would like to get a hold of really love in a villa.

The Lesbian Breakup Curse is over simply a mystical (and maybe astrological) phenomenon seizing our very own social-media feeds. It fulfills a necessity for content material which is relatable, realistic, and connected to the queer neighborhood. When I had been at long last in a position to secure my personal phone, dried out my tears, put-on some chunky program shoes, and do the L.A. lesbian bar world by storm, the # 1 topic of talk was actually, predictably, the Curse. This is our Ultra Bowl.

Lesbian representation when you look at the news is actually little (and questionable!) at best, once considering mindless gay break up material, it’s slim pickings for all of us queers. This fixation using the exclusive matchmaking schedules of lesbian women is due to a desperation for actually great gay television. Whenever we had a lesbian internet dating tv show regarding carabiners, the Woods on a Wednesday night, and traveling 12 hrs and three-time areas for a primary date, we probably wouldn’t need to focus really on a “curse” that was laid out for all of us on TikTok.

So indeed, its correct I happened to be a victim of the Lesbian break up Curse (seemingly, it hits people with less than 100 fans on TikTok, also), nevertheless pulled me personally upwards because of the bootstraps, slapped me around several times, got myself through the dog-poop phase, and aided me personally acquire some necessary point of view. In reality, I think We’ll credit my personal entire recovery to your Curse — we gays really raise one another upwards, cannot we? And speaking of raising right up, right be concerned, no exes happened to be hurt from inside the authorship of this story. In fact, after half a session of lovers therapy and another Phoebe Bridgers concert, we’re not precisely exes any longer. (Gay, i understand.)